A dear friend from Uganda, whom I frequently keep in touch with, sent me a very disheartening, unfortunate message:
"today has been really sad for me, yesterday I spent a night at my friend's place and it really rained heavily at night, in the morning I went to check my room and I felt so sad that bags, clothes were really wet..."
I never had to worry about my tin roof, over my tiny, one-room house, leaking and getting my stuff all wet. Many of my worries, concerns, and problems look very different from the average Ugandan's worries. I have always struggled with romanticizing poverty. I must constantly remind myself that living in poverty doesn't equate to a more ready heart of thanksgiving.
I have been thinking a lot lately about how to cultivate a more grateful heart...how to live in sync with soul and body and God....how to slow down and wake up and fully live. After all we are God's breath, God's life, God's glory. How paradoxical and offensive it is to think how ungrateful we can be at times when every single fiber of our being is made in His glory...we exude His glory.
I like being around people, there is so much in life, in my life, that I love, I have so many curiosities, interests, hobbies, hobbies I hope to pick up sometime, so many ambitions, dreams, hopes, plans, so many places I still want to travel to, several post-docs I dream about pursuing, countless lists of books I want to read........and all these things are great but they can be so distracting sometimes. We are relational beings who have many interests and we live in a world of many interesting things...some of which can help us draw closer to God but if we don't take the time to slow down then it is almost impossible to truly cultivate a heart of thanksgiving. Although God can be found in all these things, it can be terribly hard for us to find God in them when we are in a hurried rush. We are commanded to enter His courts with thanksgiving. When we are thankful we see God more clearly but thankfulness cannot be deeply planted in our hearts if we don't first slow down enough to reflect on what we are thankful for.
Help us, Lord, to learn to give thanks incessantly, to make every sigh and every breath one of thanksgiving, help us to give thanks for the breeze through the open window, help us to give thanks for the elderly man picking out flowers at the florist, help us to live in a posture of gratitude.
We have been offered grace upon grace upon grace upon grace upon more grace....the amount of grace we give depends on how grateful we are for the grace we have been given.
Though we grieve, though we wonder, we must slow down and wake up and perceive each moment for what it is: holy, ordinary, amazing grace...a gift.
